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Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Family are Friends who Have Your Back

My friend, Jeff, has offered to approach LOM to find out why his rabid attacks have increased. I agreed, but I have to tell you I do not expect anything to really change. I expect him to deny he is doing anything, to blame me for what he is doing and to unleash a fury of accusations against me.

However, I know that my real friends here in the Valley know me and know what I do and what I don't do. They will know what is being taken out of context (he mightily objects to blogs I have written about the 12 steps, about my own father and his inability to be a good father, my weight, my run-in with the Fake Vietnam Vet that cost me money and humbled me as far as thinking I could never be conned, my unhappiness with my job when I started it 2 and a half years ago...he has also objected to my refusal to engage him, my trying to engage him, my talking with his daughter, my NOT talking with his daughter....the list goes on and on). They will know I am not a vindictive, nasty woman trying to bring down a poor, defenseless newcomer.

At least I hope they will know....but if they don't I cannot make them trust me.

I have been thinking a lot about how much my Lord was hated, reviled and rejected. Believe me, I understand that I am supposed to be grateful to have this suffering because it may mean He loves me so much He is giving me a bigger share of His Cross.

Truth be told, however, I wish He would love someone else for awhile.

Work is stressful. We are short staffed, we have too much to do and we are not making enough money. What else is new? I know of no organization - public or private - that is not having a tough time these days. The cracks in our facade are becoming more numerous - frankly, we are tired. All of us are tired...and so I am trying to keep in mind that being overworked and underpaid is not a recognized Handicap.

Thank GOD (Thank you, God!) for the Sacraments - the Eucharist, of course, but the Sacrament of Reconciliation that has allowed me to take my anxiety, worries and fears to the feet of Jesus and say, "Here You go.....take these, please....I can't do Your Will overburdened with this kind of stuff."

I have been listening to the book Game Change - the 'definitive' book about the last Presidential Campaign. It is fascinating. The stuff of politics makes me realize I was smart to stay away from that life. Talk about bloodthirsty - politicians are worse than Great White Sharks. But what really gets me is that the staff members that surround these politicians are fanatically loyal. They are all ready to fall on their sword for Hilary, Obama, John or Sarah...and then, when they are asked or forced to do so, they act bewildered and confused because their particular leader is a jerk.

I am enjoying the book. It is like looking through a window into a house I didn't even know had been built.

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