How do grifters work?
As someone who has fallen victim to the wiles of the conman, I have learned a few things. I wish I had known them earlier, but I didn't.
I cannot claim to be an expert but I discovered that the great good that came out of my experience with Rick-the-Fake-Vietnam Hero was that I now trust that inner voice...the voice I have come to believe is that of my Guardian Angel, whispering gently to me to RUN FOR MY LIFE rather than stick around and try to befriend the Evil manifesting before me.
The best way to combat this kind of evil is to
a) recognize it
b) do not get drawn into its craziness
c) never be afraid to answer any question with truth
d) do NOT allow them to control any situation
Here is a great example: There is currently a debate going on where a LOM is being challenged by an abused member of his family regarding his tales of combat in Vietnam. The man in question has claimed to his estranged child that he is a combat veteran, a Marine (most of the cons have been either Marines, Army Special Forces or Navy Seals...no one is every just a guy in the infantry) and has suffered from PTSD for 30 years. She has questioned him because she has caught him in some inconsistencies.
I have encouraged her to go to the public record for her information. As a result, he is attacking ME...and one of the weirdest things he wants to know is whether or not I have served in the military.
His strategy is to throw mud and dust up by making a weird claim that, because I have NOT served in the military, I have no right to be outraged by people who claim they HAVE served in the military.
You are correct - there is no logic in this but it is typical of the Grifter. Rather than shutting UP and waiting to see whether or not the person doing the checking can get the information necessary they attack...and they attack the victim.
When I discovered the con Rick-the-Fake-Vietnam-Vet had pulled on me and confronted him, in a deposition hearing, with the correct information his response was, "I am so sorry your life is so shallow that you have to be interested in mine".
Now, this man had gotten 30 grand of my money based on a fake resume...and he tried to make ME feel bad for finding out the truth about him.
This is what LOM is doing right now...he is jumping up and down, throwing virtual feces at his enemies in much the same way as a monkey in a zoo. He keeps declaring over and over again that WE are the infants, WE are the horrible ones, WE are at fault...and he just looks more and more stupid...it is freaking amazing.
How does a Catholic respond to this?
I am not angry at this man...I feel such compassion and empathy for him. I know exactly what it is like to be on the outside looking in, to want desperately for those around you to love you, to hear you, to take you seriously and I also know how crazy it is to behave badly and then not expect consequences for that behavior. This person is beligerent, nasty and mean...and then he gets his feelings hurt when he will not be directly addressed.
So, how do I respond?
Prayer...penance...sacrifice...this is a human being in such pain, and so alone that he cannot see straight. His own children have rejected him. His entire life has done loops and spins out of control and how in the hell can you hate someone like that?
Of course, that's the answer isn't it? Only someone willing to go to hell can hate this poor creature.
And today, because I am sober and because I know who I am, I am not willing to go to hell for him.
St Therese used to tell Our Father in Heaven that she would willingly go to hell if it meant others would go to heaven....and you know, that is why that little girl is a Saint and a Doctor of the Church today.
I have a funny feeling I am not meant for that kind of greatness, because I just cannot muster up the courage to tell Abba I am willing to go to hell if He will heal LOM.
*sigh*
Well, it is progress not perfection. I am willing to do my reading this morning before I get on the road. I am so grateful today for the internet because the Daily Mass Readings are easily accessible for the busy woman.
Especially the busy woman who doesn't want to go to hell.
7 comments:
LSK I found you AND I learned how to sign in! That is quite the feat for me on blogger:) I really appreciate your words. I know I may not always be going about things in the right manner, but I know I am not wrong.... if that makes any sense:) I would love to send you an email are you able to see mine?
OK - here we go! You may email me at lklin@so.cccounty.us or at my home at lsk49rs@aol.com. You are doing the right thing, kiddo. I know it is difficult - it was for me when I found out that Rick Seguin had lied to me about being a combat Vietnam Veteran....but knowing the truth allowed me to grow, to heal and (eventually) to forgive. That HAS to be your goal, my darling girl...to FORGIVE...and you CAN!
LSK...you handle your attackers quite well....As I on the other hand get a timeout! And by the way, I have two family members on The Hive who are doing some posting for me!
thank you, Jack.
I tried to send you a quick email, but I'm not sure it sent out right:)
LSK- I sent you a short e-mail, just to see if I got it right. Let me know if you if you get it:)
You did! Cool. I think I might be the Queen of the Cyber World!... But wait, I still don't know how to space my paragraphs at The Hive!:).... I might have to put that title off for awhile:)
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