Entitled Beliefs

 This was the best Christmas I had since my mother's last one - the one where the 'Back East Family' joined us here and we had a big celebration at my late brother's home.  I have decided this Christmas was special and beautiful because I allowed my mentor to point out one of my character defects - Entitlement. This allowed me to focus my prayer for relief from self-aggrandizing so that I can be of better service to God and the people around me.  

I do not have a Santa Claus God or a Sweepstakes God.  When I get something 'right' in the spiritual realm, God does not pat me on the head and then reward me with good stuff.  Rather, I believe that Grace is dumped on the just and unjust alike, all day every day.  If I can become unblocked, if I can actually open that Channel of Peace, then I get to recognize the blessings in my life.  This Christmas there were so many.

A group of people who had been scattered among a crowd that truly was unappreciative of their talents and willingness to share have found each other.  I then found them and I get to hang around them now. At least four nights a week and one day on the weekend, I am knee deep in paradise.  As a result of us finding each other, newer people to our land of hope are finding us.  The Tribe is growing and the love and purpose is so strong.  I could have missed that....

I get to be a safe and supportive place to land for someone I love more than my own life and this holiday season that came in handy.  I could have missed that......

A beautiful woman I have known since birth sent me a message of love two days in a row.  I could have missed that.....

My late friend Karen's family welcomed me into their home for Christmas Eve.......I could have missed that.....

I got to celebrate Midnight Mass with someone I love sitting next to me....someone who was so tired from work but still did that just to they could spend time with me.  I could have missed that.....

I could have missed it all.  I could have refused to listen to my mentor.  I could have refused to face my character defect that keeps me from the sunlight of God's Grace.  By seconds and inches, I could have been one of those bitter old women who sees nothing but sadness and injustice and whines all the time.

Thank you, God, for my life today EXACTLY as it is.....because I could have missed it all and because of YOU?

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!