MY Christmas Letter

 You know those Christmas letters sent out every year from those friends you have with perfect lives?

Every time I receive one, even from the friends I love, I want to rip it up and throw it around the room like confetti.

Why?

Jealousy, of course - how dare they have the type of life (on paper) that seems to flow smoothly throughout the year as if it is some sort of cosmic gentle river meandering through the woods?

These letters have been arriving at my house for decades.  Precursors to social media posts (look how perfect my family is as we romp in the snow or gambol on the beach?) that cause people to think their own life is somehow lacking, Christmas and New Year Letters are both fun to receive and a cause of anguish.  

Of course most of you are fine with the letters.  You are far more mature than me.  I get that and I accept it and I have come to the conclusion that while you are wise and wonderful, I get to have more fun emoting.  That's right - for me it can be a way to pass the time, a hobby, a fun way of letting off steam.  

With that in mind, please accept my Holiday Christmas Letter for 2020.

Family and Friends - 

2020 has been a year of triumphs, tragedy and blown diets.  Starting with having to endure NFL referees who wouldn't know an offensive holding call if it bit them in the butt and including the celebration of 28 years of sobriety, the death of my mother  (both in May) and my contracting COVID-19, 2020 can kiss my big ol' Irish/Italian behind.  The house got painted.  WOOOPPPPEEE.  I also bought a new bed.  Good for me.  The dog still has dermatitis and the cat seems to think that getting up at 4:30am is reasonable if she is hungry.  Hunter Pence retired.  Bosa got hurt the first damn game of the year and quite frankly this year cannot get behind me fast enough.  At least we beat the Rams....twice.

I lost friends to that ridiculous QAnon nonsense and discovered there are Catholics who have installed a whiny Cardinal as an alternative to the legitimate Chair of Peter and so now adhere to what I describe as the Alt-magisterium.  I blame Russia. 

The American Solidarity Party tripled its participation and voting numbers this year, which is good news.  It means more people are flocking to a banner of Reason.  However, it also means that some people are convinced we are the reason the sitting president lost the election - that is, if they even believe he lost at all - and so we have to constantly explain ourselves to people.  We even had a Super Catholic call us Evil because someone in our party used the word 'collective'.  OH THE SHAME.  

I got to participate in my 12 Step Program all over the world because of Zoom.  As a result I now mentor a young lady who lives in Tehran.  That being said, I have also been told I am untrustworthy and a sheeple because I do not go to in person meetings and because I wear a mask in public.  What I can tell you is this:  the name of the organization I belong to is NOT  Well Adjusted People Anonymous.

We have lost so many people of note this year and we have watched our country ignite with legitimate passion for change as well as flat out stupidity in places like Portland, Oregon.  Standing for Anarchy.  Oh goody, that's a great idea.  I am sure THIS time it will work.

Yup, this is my Christmas Letter...but I don't want you to think this has been a year of woe.  I have made new friends.  I have had the support of old friends during tough times.  I am studying with my Dominican Chapter and I am preparing for a new chapter in my life.  I am learning how to manage a Trust.  I am losing excess weight and staying healthy after my own bought with Covid-19.  I pray every day for those people who no longer are friends of mine.  

And I got the Disney+ channel so I can watch my Star Wars and Marvel movies without regret.

Happy Advent.  Merry Christmas.  Happy Hanukkah.  May the God of the Universe continue to bless us by giving us another day to get it right.

GO NINERS!