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Friday, February 27, 2009

Weird Stuff at The Hive

You know, I have made some pretty good cyber friends on The Hive. We don't always agree on everything, but for the most part we have civil exchanges and we support each other when the crazies attack. There are some who share my Faith, others who do not but we have a fun connection through mutual interests, etc...but there is a woman who posts on the site that I think JHeaton has hit the absolute button about in terms of mental illness.

She is quite intelligent but there is just something, well...'off'. Her posts are vitriolic. She slings mud in poetic manner and then takes GREAT umbrage if someone disagrees with her and she gets nastier and nastier. It is just plain sad, really, because her entire persona just screams "I am in so much PAIN". However, she has erected a barbed wire fence of hatred around herself and there is just no getting through - and I do not mean to change her views or beliefs. It is simply impossible to have a discussion with her about anything.

Anyway, it's a darn shame when people degenerate like that, though I can remember a time when that was the way I presented myself to the world. Both fists up and ready to swing.

Of course, I was drinking then.

Today I am just saddened by this type of situation because I have a picture in my mind of a woman trapped by her own bile, struggling to make a connection and only able to do so with someone who agrees with her 150%. If you have a mind of your own, watch out...she will attack with both barrels calling you a pious hypocrite because you believe in God but do not agree with her.

ah well....

I wanted to take a moment to share with everyone that things are gotten much much much better for me at work. E came back from the training changed - in a good way, I think - and I also firmly believe that the Sacramental Salt and the blessed picture of Blessed Teresa of Calcutta I have taped to the bottom of our shared chair is also helping. Yup, it's still there (I just checked). No, she is not perfect (neither am I) and it will take a long time for her to repair a lot of the damage she did to the clerks under her but I have got to give thanks to Jesus, Mary and Joseph for the attempts I have seen her make to be kinder, calmer and just plain nicer.

This morning I will be heading to the oral surgeon to have that tooth pulled. I am not looking forward to it but I am looking forward to the problem being solved. I have been dealing with the pain and constant infection for about a year, I think. I would tell the dentist but they could never find anything specific. After awhile I would just stop complaining about it because I thought there would never be a solution. Well, they found a shattered root on the xray last Wednesday and so out the whole tooth will come. Luckily, it is way in the back so if I cannot afford the bone grafts and implant and blah blah blah no one will see that I am now (officially) toothless and living in the Central Valley.

I received my Lenten Magnificat from the Parish and I have to recommend this little book to people. There is a reading, a writing from a holy person and a suggestion for an action for each day of the Lenten Season. Today, for instance, it was suggested that I pray for another person's intention through out the work day and I have done just that - I am praying for my friend Rooster who is slowly and painfully making his way home to the Holy Mother Church. He has a cross to bear in that he is Gay...but our wonderful pastor Father Illo has made him feel so welcomed and loved and wanted by his Catholic Family that yesterday Rooster told me that he is realizing his cross is no different from my cross...what is important, he said, is that he recognize it is a cross and he can bear it with the help of Our Lord.

This coming from a man who once dressed ME in drag and took me to a party as his date - I was decked out like never before (outside of my days as a Fag Hag hanging in the Castro) and I must admit I had a great time until I saw a man who looked better in a dress than I did....

he had better legs.

St Therese, please send Rooster a rose...and while you are at it, send one to Robert, JHeaton, Mt. Mom, Mollie, Jodi and Virginia...they need some signs that they are LOVED.....aim it at their heads so they'll know its from YOU.


Robert Stanford said...

I can so relate - very nice post - keep them coming -

a follower.

chimakuni said...

Just think - you don't HAVE to fast today - you ARE fasting today!

Praying for an uneventful recovery for you...

chimakuni said...

(blonde moment there!)...

I am also praying for Rooster and for the woman on the Hive - keep showing her the love of Christ, which I know you do, and she will one day realize it WAS Christ who loved her back outside of herself!

love you and thank you for all you do for those of us who are us!