Yes, Someone is Listening

 The past few weeks has been an emotional fun house trip.  The emotions have been high.  The sins of the world - especially mine - have been right smack in my face.  Frankly, I haven't felt so good.

In the Catholic tradition of giving meaning to suffering I have viewed this as a time of penance and a chance to help others out of Purgatory.  With my tongue firmly planted in my cheek I have said out loud that someone somewhere better be benefiting from all this or top management was gonna hear from me.  

Sunday was the day I took my complaints to the top.

I attended Mass in Healdsburg, California at a beautiful parish off the main street.  The pews weren't full but they weren't empty.  The Gospel readings were about people leaving Jesus when His Teachings got a little too much for them to handle.  I was prepped and ready, my Dominican scapular in place, and on my knees in prayer before Mass when the need to call on someone more powerful than myself for assistance crossed my mind.

So I did...I went to my patron, St. Margaret of Costello, and told her what was going on with me.  And then I asked, very clearly, for help and a sign that someone, anyone at all, was listening to me.

After Mass I knelt to pray the Prayer of St. Michael the Archangel and I could sense someone standing next to me, patiently waiting.  When I finished, I heard them say, "amen" and I looked up into the lively blue eyes of an elderly gentleman who smiled behind his mask.  He pointed at my scapular and said, "Are you a Dominican?"

"I am", I answered, rising to my feet.  He smiled broadly (so broad that even with a face mask you could not miss it) and he said, "SO AM I!".

We stood quietly sharing for at least 15 minutes.  His wife joined us and he introduced me.  I caught him up on what was happening at the priory in Oakland and the passing of Fr. Tony.  He shared stories of him and his brother Kevin who, he said, probably met Fr. Tony at the Gates with a "What took you so long, little brother?" and a big hug.  I felt peace settling over my heart and I was quietly thanking the little said for this obvious sign.  I then gave the gentleman my card, telling him about our chapter and our zoom meetings and urging him to email me so we could include him when I saw him staring intently at my card.

There is a tiny line on my card: Sober since 5-4-1992 and loving it.

He paused, leaned closer and whispered, "Are you a friend of Bill W.'s?"

You bet I am....and he then said, "If I mind my manners until December, I will have 50 years".

Listening?  Listening?

Oh I know I have a God who loves me but this was one of those over-the-top moments that I rarely have.  I am not a saint.  I am usually looking for the breadcrumbs of experiences that reinforce my beliefs and I can find them...I can, if I look hard enough.

THIS?

I almost burst into tears.  

Thank you, God, for my life today.  I don't need to do anything other than what You ask....I don't have to put anyone down, demand you all think like me or else....All I have to do is Love God, clean house and help others....

All I have to do is ask.