Wednesday, July 25, 2012

I Have No Idea Why

Well.

I am not sure what is wrong with the blogs here or it if it my computer at work, but right now my blog looks normal to me.

So anyway, the past few days has been very strange.  I lost two sponsees via email and text messages, which I think is the coward's way out of ending a relationship.  I found out my possible new unit may end up further away from Modesto than planned which will not make it a possible new unit after all, and I still have thirty three pounds to lose in order to make my goal weight.

I am getting muscles, though - I can actually see them sometimes.  But I have cheated sometimes on the eating (I am having coffee again..need to stop) and I have not gotten to the gym since getting back from  San Diego because I have been so sick with a lousy summer cold.

In other words, I have not felt like the perky little thing I usually feel like; rather, I am feeling like a sick, stuffed up, unloved, fat and icky woman that no one wants to be around.

Of course we all know that 'feelings' are not reality.  I am sick and stuffed up but I am not unloved and I am not icky.  I am a very nice woman.

Just as it is not a good idea to always trust my feelings,  it is always a good idea to trust Truth.  Jesus, The Truth, promises me His Love if I want it and so I make the choice each day to embrace His Love.  The embrace of Love means I have responsibilities of course; I must follow His Teachings to the best of my ability each day.   Simply believing in Him (Faith Alone) does not guarantee my eternal salvation.  Even the devil believes in Him and we all know where he lives, right?

The point is my having my feelings hurt or going through a rough couple of days does not mean I get to forget I am loved.  I have to remember, I have to trust, that I am loved even when I don't feel it.

Jesus, I trust in You.


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