Let me tell you, I think I have finally reached my limit.
Of course, I say that a lot and about a lot of different things.
But this time? I honestly mean it - I think.
I am trying to put pen to paper around my father and the complicated relationship I had with him.
I put a test run on The Hive, gave an encouraging word to a young mother who is putting her past behind her and actually going to Law School (which is no easy thing to do, believe me) and I get attacked by LOM.
My friend Robert does not think he is drinking. I cannot say yay or nay on that one but I will tell you this, he is the typical newcomer to the 'nth' degree. He is mean, snarky, whiny and a bully...if you go at him head on he becomes a wimpering little baby and if you try and talk to him like an adult he becomes a condensending jerk. So, I am not addressing him at all. It seems to infuriate him even more but it keeps me out of sin.
But that's not what I have had it with - believe it or not, LOM is such a sad, sad person that all I can do is pity him and pray for him. I will let that count as loving him for now because I am not a saint and I cannot say I love this guy.
Nope - I tell you what I have had it with: meat loaf.
You read it here first, folks. I have determined that meat loaf is a plot used by mothers the world over to get their kids to eat stuff no kid would ever allow on their plate let alone in their mouths.
Now, my mom makes great meat loaf...but it is NORMAL. There is meat, eggs, milk, olive oil and the acceptable Italian spices (the Irish do not believe in spices as use of a spice might cut the taste of the whiskey or beer one puts in the meat loaf, depending on whether or not it is a Feast Day). A true meat loaf should never go beyond a gourmet ketchup as its sauce. And a real meat loaf tastes like MEAT. That is how it should be and how it should always be - amen.
Last night, however, I was subjected to someone else's meat loaf - and I do not know what was in it but my personal belief is that meat loaf should never have anything in it that is green or purple and it should never be crunchy.
And as the wide-eyed little haute cuisine chef huddled over me, watching me chew her crunchy meat loaf, all I could think of was "Holy Spirit, fill the heart and mind of your faithful servant so that I can say the right thing without having to have a second helping, because I do not know what this is and it tastes really awful".
Well, HS did the job because I was able to say, "This is really different!" in a very enthusiastic voice and follow that up with, "Oh I wish I could have more but I gained two pounds last week and need to get back on the wagon. But thank you so much!".
I do not mind trying new things. I have always been an adventuresome eater and willing to try local dishes when in exotic lands. I have even eaten chocolate covered bugs of various types. Of course that was long ago and I wasn't sober but I did eat them.
Yet in my tiny finite mind some things are sacred and meat loaf is one of them. I was able to avoid having to take any home where I know it would have been greated with a chorus of, "What is this purple stuff in the middle?".
And I would have had to admit that I still don't know what it was....God, forgive her her trespass....